Hancock

Who's going to see Hancock? Raise your hands! Who HAS to go see Hancock because the wife/girlfriend/bitch and/or kids want to go and your ass has to pay? Raise your hands. Who's going to see Hancock because they think its gonna be off the chain? Raise your hands.
Now, everybody from group 1 and group 3 put your hands down and save your money for the DVD.

Now first off, let's get some things straight up in this bitch. Will Smith is my nigga. He has the life that many black men want - he's one of the 5 highest paid actors in the U.S. He has a bangin' wife and beautiful kids. Most of the world respects him because they watched him go from nothing to something by hard work in his field. He managed to do all of that without slangin' yayo or having to have to step on a bunch of necks to get there. In effect, Will Smith is somewhat of a "superhero" in his own right. Any successful black man who comes up in that way is (see: Barack Obama, etc.) I wanted to make it clear that I am not shitting on Will Smith the man.

Now that that's clear - this movie was some emotionally driven bullshit. Its a chick flick with a superhero in it. Its a kid's movie. One of the things that can make or break a superhero movie is a good villian. This one doesn't have it. The 2003 Hulk didn't either and look how that went. I wouldn't say the movie sucks but its an action-comedy. Naw, fuck that Hollywood media term bullshit. You know what this movie is? Its a special effects children's story with funny parts in it. Basically, Hancock is a lone hero in the world who is looking for acceptance. The nigga has emotional problems. He drinks all the time because he is depressed. He is depressed because he's somewhat of a fuck-up even though he's a hero. He's somewhat of a fuck-up because he stopped caring when people stopped appreciating him and started picking at all of his flaws no matter what he did. This movie should have been called "What if Superman was a nigga". Basically everyone treats him like a nigg(er) regardless of what he tries to do. He saves Jason Bateman's life, who just so happens to work in public relations and decides to try to help Hancock get a better public image. One of those things involved guess what? What do all white folk want us to do when they can't control us? Yep. He has to GO TO JAIL. I found this particular part of the movie annoying and couldn't help but think "they would have never asked Superman to go to jail for wrecking shit". Even Mr. Incredible from the Incredibles didn't have to do time. How much time did Tony Stark have to do? Did Spider-Man do a bid? The Thing? Nope. The big fear that I have about this movie is that most of mainstream white America - who its aimed at - is not going to truly understand that there is an underlying message about life as a black man in this movie and because this movie failed to properly delve into it (of course it wouldn't - its basically a kid's movie), people will only feel sorry for Hancock instead of understanding the perspective that he lives from. Its all about "if this supernigga would just live within the parameters we set for him, everything will be okay" and to a lesser extent, that's how life really is for many of us. Assimilate or there will be trouble. If you do, there's a small reward of acknowledgment and semi-acceptance in it for you. But, I digress.

Anyway, more shit happens that I can't disclose without spoiling the movie. He discovers that he knows someone from way back. Eventually he reveals that he has amnesia (that old shit again?) and can't remember who or what he is. All this self-realization and internal examination shit got on my nerves and amidst a bunch of "touching family moments" and "kid and 'Mean Joe' moments" (old school coke commercial) and "awww" moments they managed to work in some special effects. I think I only actually counted three deaths total. One doesn't count and the other two you can only assume they are dead because you didn't see them die - but its a safe assumption. This movie needed a super-villian BADLY! The only reason its not PG is because of the language. There's no nudity and all of the action is in shoot-outs where nobody dies and in displays of abilities by Hancock. To top it off, they throw in a star-crossed lovers type story. Now you KNOW Will ain't gettin' no pussy in a PG flick, right? Wesley would; Will? "Aw hell naw!"

Man, I want to say that this flick is great and everybody should go see it. I want to say that its better than "I Am Legend". In truth, all I can really say is that its good to take the kids to, your wife/girlfriend/bitch will probably like it more than you will and that Akiva Goldsman is a fuckin' hack writer/producer that needs to get the fuck outta the movie industry. Now that I've seen his face in this movie, maybe I can "loom" Angelina Jolie and James McAvoy into murking this mutha fucka. Did I just cross movies? Oops, sorry.

Hancock will probably do well at the box office but its not the summer blockbuster that most of Will's other movies have been. As it stands, if given the choice, I think I'd rather be Will Smith than Hancock and if given the choice to see them again for the first time, I'd rather see I Am Legend than Hancock. That's not a bad thing to me because I liked "I Am Legend". I'm just not down with the 'chick flcik wrapped in a superhero movie' theme that this movie carried. Don't invite me to John Hancock's pity party; invite me to Mike Lowery's pussy party.
DVD it if you can. Matinee it if you must. If you think I'm lyin' then you're an asshole. That's all I'mma say. Peace.